Friday, September 21, 2007

Chocoholic Anonymous

I will be attending my 10-year high school reunion next month. This means I have started a “weight maintenance” program. I don’t like the D-word. You know, the one that starts with D and ends with IET. Yes, that’s a bad word and I don’t say bad words. Never mind the fact that the weight I want to maintain is currently 5 pounds less than what I weigh, I am not on a Di…well, that word. Anyway, as part of this weigh maintenance program, I took the opportunity to have a free consultation with one of the personal trainers at the gym. I started with my goals.

Me: I want to focus on toning my arms and of course, I wouldn’t mind losing 5 pounds. I also want to learn how to incorporate free weights into my work routine.
Trainer: Okay. Let’s get your weight info and measurements.

* Sucking in while you stand on a scale doesn’t help you weigh less. Ahem...

Trainer: Tell me about your diet. What liquids do you drink?
Me: Water! I don’t drink alcohol or soda - I love water.
Trainer: That’s really good. What about meals?
Me: I try to eat five small meals a day. I snack on fruits and vegetables. I’m not a vegetarian but I don’t eat meat very often – maybe 2 or 3 times a week.
Trainer: Okay. What about fish?
Me: Only when I go out for sushi. I don’t cook fish.
Trainer: Well...you eat rather healthy, drink lots of water and have worked out consistently for over four years…I don't get it, what’s your weakness?
Me: Chocolate! I love chocolate chips straight from the bag. Man...I binge on chocolate.
Trainer: Define binge. Is this like a candy bar every night or a handful of chocolate chips here and there?
Me: Um, more like “A” bag of chocolate chips.
Trainer: The Whole Bag?! In one sitting?!
Chocoholic: Yes.
Trainer: Okay. You need to stop that!
Chocoholic: Trust me…I’ve been trying for years.

Thus the weight maintenance program begins. All I have to say about the reunion is one thing: there had better be chocolate!

15 comments:

ThomCarter said...

I would like to point you to the first quote on ThomCarter.

I think that you might agree and then go buy one.

I'm Chrissy! said...

Holy freak! A whole bag?!? Wow, you're worse than I am. I thought I was bad, but woah momma!

Diet is just "die" with a "t".

Above Average Joe said...

No alcohol or soda, small amount of meat and you don't cook fish?

Now you are just showing off.

bec said...

bag shmag, I think I ate half a half gallon of ice cream the other day. Ice cream is my weakness.

Bone said...

That's a fair amount of chocolate, he says as he's finishing off a honey bun and 20 ounce Mountain Dew at 4 PM on a Friday afternoon.

I'm Chrissy! said...

Oh, hey Charlotte, I just tagged you... I would have sworn you had already been tagged. I didn't forget you.

Coordination Queen said...

mmmm, chocolate... are we talking, dark, semi-sweet, or milk?

vladtech said...

If I recall correctly, there was this one Simpson's episode where Homer was running through the woods in the night, all eerie, when came up on a partially hidden billboard that read "DIE". Homer screams in horror. Then when he gains full visibility of the billboard, it said "DIET". Homer screams again.

Your post reminded me of that. Good luck with your addiction, heh heh.

Vivian Love said...

Don't you know: "In the beginning, the Lord created chocolate, and He saw that it was good. Then He separated the light from the dark, and it was better." That's my favorite scripture!

charlotta-love said...

Thom: I have a fondue fountain. It's awful to clean.

Chrissy: Don't under estimate me! (thanks for the tag)

Joe: ...AND I can eat a whole bag of chocolate chips. Betcha can't do THAT!

Bec: Ice cream..... Mmmm...

Bone: Lol. We all have our weaknesses. Mine come around 4PM too.

Coordination Queen: DARK!!! Not a fan of milk. Bleech.

Vlad: I never saw that one but I can picture Homer screaming. lol. At least my addiction isn't doughnuts! D'oh.

Vivian: AWESOME. Any other scriptures I need to know about? :o)

michelle said...

charlotte the important thing when working out is to obtain your "theoretical maximum" heart rate and maintain it for at least 30 minutes 3x a wk. i recommend more than that though. ur theoretical max is 70-85% of normal heart rate. so to get it subtract ur age from 220 (beats)...then take 70-85% of that and that is what u should always have ur heart rate as while ur working out...very simple bc that is a fast-paced walk for me...

Celine & Cameron said...

I love your blog! You have such a great way of telling stories! I can totally relate to the chocolate thing (remember where I grew up?) :)

Craig D said...

Reminds me of a story "someone" told me last century.

"Well, I had just eaten a pound bag of Hershey's kisses and I was vomiting into the toilet. The next thing I knew, I was out cold on the bathroom floor."

How amny thing are wrong with this picture, I ask you?

The good news is, she has been eating much healthier since the bariatric surgery!

Craig D said...

Oh, I left out the fact that the bag of Hersheys Kisses were for breakfast!

Shankar said...

When I went around different countries in Europe, I used to specially seek out chocolate made in that country. It was a bit tough in Spain and Holland, but you wouldn't believe how good Dutch chocolate is. Germany and Denmark make lots of great chocolate.

And props to you for preferring dark. So do I, but it's not always easy to find it everywhere.