Monday, December 31, 2007

Happy New Year

Reasons why I loved Christmas.
Incidently, the same reasons why the New Year will be difficult.

Oh man. Christmas was sweet! The type of sweet that melts in your mouth and then clogs your arteries. Oh blessed, sweet, corn syrupy Christmas. I will miss you.

Friday, December 28, 2007

Candy Land

I used to work for a company that held seminars for people interested in Real Estate. I was on the phone with a customer one day and they asked, "Do you realize the knowledge you have at your fingertips?!" I awkwardly admitted I had never attended a seminar or looked through any material. The customer, completely amazed at my lack of interest, refrained from scolding me and I mentally committed to learn the tricks of the trade. The knowledge I left with wouldn't qualify me as an instructor but it is enough to appreciate these fine works of gingerbread houses - well, graham cracker anyway.

FOR SALE: 1 bedroom; 1 bath; snow capped roof; mint brick; licorice door frame; nerd paneling; gumdrop bushes. Complimentary roof opening for summer breeze. Total Fat: 9G Calories: 360 Market Price: $2.61 Nice Neighborhood. Call Muffin Man (on Drury Lane) for more details.

FOR SALE: Modified Double-wide; 2 bedroom; 1.5 bath; gummi bear insulated roof; licorice piping door, window, and walkway; cookie/snow capped side decal; minty walls; m&m garden. Total Fat: 11G Calories: 398 Market Price: $4.23 Able to deliver. Call Little Debbie for details.

FOR SALE: Abandoned cookie house in woods. Great fixer-upper project for ambitious owner. 1 bedroom; 1 bath; gumdrop grass; gummi bear adorned lawn (mass graveyard?); licorice trunk in roof for potential fire escape or tree swing; house entirely filled with skittles, gummi bears, and m&ms for midnight snacks; child delight. Total Fat: 21G Calories: 618 Market Price: $6.29 Call former occupants - Hansel & Gretel for details. They prefer phone interviews - something about breadcrumbs and witches.

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

I'm Dreaming of a Red Christmas

Redneck that is.
You know it's a Redneck Christmas if...
at least one present comes in a Halloween Harvest bag.

You know it's a Redneck Christmas if...
at least one present is wrapped in a garbage bag.

You know it's a Redneck Christmas if...
you receive a gift wrapped in a shopping bag - and not even the store the gift came from!

You know it's a Redneck Christmas if...
any duct tape is used.

Hope you each had a wonderful Christmas be it White or Redneck!

Wednesday, December 19, 2007


pre·dict'a·ble -adjective capable of being foretold Charlotta's poses, taken over a year apart, were predictable.

re·la·ted -adjective associated; connected It was obvious the two sisters were related.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

In Love

Julia-Gulia and I enjoyed a quick road trip to Charleston, South Carolina this weekend. I've been there before but wanted JG to visit at least once before she leaves again for school in January. We were able to enjoy some shopping, the coast, a break from home obligations, and even the cool, windy weather.

Oh, I forgot to tell you one major detail. I met the man of my dreams! He's tall - a must if I continue to wear boots, dark - bronze from the sun, and handsome. He very strong - his muscles are rock hard. He loves to travel - mostly by sea, and is very outdoorsy. He is fond of pets - especially parrots. He is rich and has a great eye for hoop earrings made of gold. Oh, speaking of great eyes, his are blue, though he has bad eyesight. I also have poor eyes so our future children are doomed but I'm fortunate my eyes aren't as bad as his - he usually requires an eye patch.

We just clicked. I can't explain it. Words weren't needed. I could tell by the way he looked at me that we were meant to be.

I found out he owns his own ship so I'm sure I'll document our vacations on this blog in the recent future.

Hey, hands off sista!

Friday, December 14, 2007

Drugs: Just Say Green

A friend of mine just had knee surgery. He's been very nervous about the whole ordeal. I’ve tried to be a supporting friend but considering I can only maintain a serious perspective for about, oh, 2 minutes 37 seconds, I’m not sure how helpful I’ve been.

Him: Charlotte, I feel sick to my stomach.
The ever-compassionate, supportive friend: Are you getting sick?
Him: No. I just worry about all that could go wrong. What if the nurse gives me too much anesthesia and I don’t wake up?
Me: If that happens, can I have your cell phone? And your truck?

He called last night to report the surgery. Although this means no new phone or vehicle, I really enjoyed the call. The following conversation is brought to you by the letters Rx, prescription drugs, and the color green.

Me: Hey there! How are you feeling?
Stoned Guy: im alri butin pain.
Me: You are in pain?
Stoner: Mmhuh.
Me: Did they give you any pain medication?
Stoner: yea..ijus tookid.
Me: (smiling) Well, you sound tired. You want me to let you go?
Stoner: NO! Juss talk.
Me: About what?
Stoner: Gree...
Me: Green? The color green?
Stoner: Mmhuh.
Me: (laughing) Okay…

I'm really looking forward to the day he is completely coherent. I'll repeat all the random quotes and tease a bit. I just have to remember, it's all fun and games until I undergo surgery (if needed one day). Then I'll have a taste of my own medicine. I just hope it's Cherry Flavored.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Who Completes Me

Johnny-Cherie sent me an email forward last week explaining she was 115%. Um, 115% what? After reading through the email, I realized I was looking at a mathematical breakdown of the sexes. The first column listed "guy" characteristics followed by several "girl" behaviors. Johnny-Cherie, who is a Tomboy at heart, checked several items in both categories but overall was "guyish". After adding her guy and girl traits together, the formula said she was 115% person. Wanting to know my percentage, I took the test.

GUY PART (No matter if you're a guy or a girl)
(x)You love hoodies and jeans. and flipflops!
(x) Dogs are better than cats. Dogs will actually play back. Cats are for petting purposes only. Plus they make me sneeze.
( ) It's hilarious when people get hurt.
( ) You've played with/against boys on a team.
(x)Shopping is torture.
(x) Sad movies suck. Not a fan of the cheesy chick flicks or films that make me cry.
( ) You own an XBox/gamecube.
( ) At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
( ) You own a PSP.
( ) You own a DS, PS2 or Sega.
( ) You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
( ) You watch sports on TV.
( ) Gory movies are cool.
( ) You only go to your dad for advice.
(x) You own like a trillion baseball caps. Love hats...I don't have to do my hair.
( ) You like going to football games.
(x) You used to/do collect baseball cards. So I collected Disney cards when I was younger. We'll count this as 1/2 a point.
( ) Baggy shorts are cool to wear.
( ) It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
(x) Green, black, blue or silver are one of your favorite colors. I don't have a silver shirt but I wear enough silver jewelry to make up for that.
(x) You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
( ) Sports are fun too.

Now add the numbers up and multiply it by 5. Post as I am 37.5% guyish.

(x) You wear lip gloss.
( ) You love to shop all the time. No. We've covered this.
(x) You wear eyeliner.
( ) You have many of the same shirts in different colors.
(x) You don't like shopping at hot topic. When I do venture out, this store is fun.
(x) You wear the color pink.
( ) You consider cheerleading a sport.
( ) You hate wearing the color black.
( ) You like hanging out at the mall. Once again, this is a big fat no.
( ) You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
(x) You like wearing jewelry.
( ) Skirts are a main part of your wardrobe.
( ) Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
( ) You don't like the movie Star Wars. I actually dressed up like Princess Leah for Halloween one year.
( ) You are/were in cheerleading, gymnastics or dance. Cheerleading is not for the long-legged.
(x) It takes you around 1 hour to get dressed and put on make-up and accessories.
( ) You smile a lot more than you should. This makes someone girly?
(x) You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
(x) You care about what you look like.
(x) You like wearing dresses.

Now add the numbers up and multiply it by 5. Post as I am 45% girlish.

37.5 Boy + 45.0 Girl= 82.5 person

Oh. I suddenly feel incomplete. Not completely here or there. Johnny-Cherie? Can I borrow some of your personality?

Monday, December 10, 2007

To Eat or Not To Eat

Mama Mia makes a simple vegetable medley that I love. It's really quite simple. Take a spoonful of butter and add sliced potatoes, onions, zucchini, squash, mushrooms (if you actually enjoy that taste), and a sprinkle of spice. Cover, simmer, and enjoy.

Yesterday was busy. I had 40 quick minutes between the time I got home from church till when I would leave to attend a symphony Christmas concert. I needed some nourishment. I debated between a peanut butter sandwich or some veggies. The later seemed more appealing. Although I've never made this dish on my own, I've watched Mama Mia cook this too many times to count.

I sliced. I buttered. I combined veggies. I covered. I simmered. I waited. I blogged. I lost track of time.

...and I, uh, ate a peanut butter sandwich. Future suitors, if you are hoping to date the cook in the family, sorry but Mama Mia's happily married.

Friday, December 7, 2007

Winter Wonderland

As I listened to Winter Wonderland on the radio recently, I realized life has changed. Sleigh bells don't ring - there are no sleighs. Walking through a winter wonderland? Not in Georgia! Want to build a snowman? Where's the snow? Last year I adapted my favorite Christmas carol - Silver Bells. This year, I present a "Georgia Winter Wonderland".

Cell phones ring, won't you answer?
Car pool lanes, they're driving faster.
A beautiful sight,
The mall's lit up bright,
Walking through the Georgia Square Mall.

Gone away is the phone booth.
Here to stay is the blue tooth.
It clings to your ear,
And we can all hear,
The details of your life; what's going on.

In the mall we all can charge up more debt.
And hope we get a raise to pay it off.
We'll say, "Next year I'll go on a diet.
But ring up this dessert, I gotta try it."

Later on, as I'm buying,
A bunch of 'stuff', I'll keep trying,
To not overspend,
Or leave out a friend,
And wish I didn't know so many folks.

In the parking lot, "Now where's my car?"
"Did I park it here or over there?"
I'll have lots of fun just walking blindly.
I hope I don't pull out all of my hair.

When I'm home, oh it's thrilling,
Presents wrapping, stockings filling.
And hoping I'm done,
'Cause it's not much fun,
Walking through the Georgia Square Mall.

Walking through the Georgia Square Mall...

Monday, December 3, 2007

Father Time

I got to see Santa this weekend. Who knew he would be at the Marriot in Atlanta, Georgia? (Who knew I would be at the Marriot in Atlanta, Georgia since I live only 90 minutes away.) I quickly stepped aside to chat with Mr. Claus while my friend waited in line for her Starbuck caramel apple cider. Mmmm...

Oh yeah, back to me and Santa. Since I always have the well being of others on my mind, I asked for world peace...naturally. He didn't say anything in response. I guess my humility left him speechless. Something like that anyway.

But, I've had the whole weekend to rethink my request. Santa, I want more time. Time to finish the applications for grad school within my self inflicted timeline; time to get all the supplies for the church Christmas party this weekend; time to buy an outfit for the company Christmas party next weekend; time to shop for presents to give to my family members; time to go to the gym ~ well, that's a bit greedy of me, I'll stop there. Time. That's all I want. Time.

So if my blog seems a bit irregular compared to usual, blame it on Santa.