Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Thanks For the Memories

Several years ago, Julia-Gulia purchased a cell phone and the "We own your firstborn and the next two years of your life" contract that came with it. She endured horrible customer service, inconsistent coverage, roaming charges, and incorrect billing receipts. The month her contract expired, she called to cancel and had a rather humorous conversation with the Operator.

O: Thank you for calling phone monopoly. May I have your phone number please.
JG: 555-IAM-DONE
O: Thank you. And your social security number.
JG: 867-53-09
O: And your mother's maiden name?
JG: Miss
O: Thank you. How may I help you today?
JG: Well, actually I need to cancel my contract.
O: I can help you with that. One moment please.
...
I'm sure there was significant conversation here from Operator's Supervisor trying to convince Julia-Gulia to stay but she was having none of it. Finally, after a rather long chat, Julia-Gulia was freed from the cell phone chain. Almost.
...
O: Anything else I can help you with today?
JG: No. That's it. Thankyou.
O: (script mode) Thank you for calling today. It's been a pleasure and as always, thanks for choosing Phone... Monopoly... er... well, thanks for choosing it two years ago anyway. Um...

I guess there isn't a script for saying Good-bye

7 comments:

Craze said...

Tell your friend she probably isn't done dealing with them. I canceled a contract after 1 1/2 weeks (well within the time frame) and 4 months later I'm still getting bills and dealing with their merry go round customer support. Did I say support? I meant bull crap.

Sarah Mitchell said...

Can I talk about how much I hate dealing with companies over the phone. I had a fiasco with our phone/internet company for a few months, they finally gave in and gave me free service for a month. Not sure if the HOURS I spent on hold was worth it . . .

Patience said...

I've been with the same cell company for years and have had wonderful service with them. Of course, I'm sure others have some horror stories to tell about the same company, but I feel very fortunate.

When doing things like this I always try to keep everything written down. The person's name, time I called, number I called, etc. That helps when they inevitably keep sending bills!

R said...

I love how they put you on hold for ten years too so that they can give you some time to get impatient and just hang up so you won't cancel yet.

ThomCarter said...

I think that Boys II Men said it best:

It's So HAAAAARD to say Good BYYYYYYE to Yesterdaaaaaaaayyyyyyy

charlotta-love said...

Craze: She just signed up today with another company. Oh boy...

Sarah: Hours isn't joking. And when you are counting minutes, it's a HUGE deal.

Patience: I'm fortunate too! I've been with the same company since 2005.

R: I wonder what they really are doing while I'm on hold. Probably blogging...

Thom: wow! Flashback to high school...

Shankar said...

I had no problems cancelling my phone contract. I showed them my air ticket and my passport, and told them I was leaving the country. No sweat.