Monday, March 31, 2008

Let's Chat

Blogger Friend! I have good news and bad news.
Good news first.
I received my letter of acceptance to the University of Georgia!
That is wonderful! Is this for your undergrad or masters degree?
Masters. My undergrad was in Recreation Management.
What will be your program of study?
Bless you.
No, that is the major. My emphasis will be on physical and health education.
Wait, I thought you already were taking classes.
I took the first half of Anatomy last quarter. It fulfills some general classes needed for my Masters. The second half of the class starts tomorrow.
On April 1st?
I know. Lame April Fool’s joke if you ask me.
Weren’t you supposed to get married?
Oh. Right. That will have to wait.
Well, what’s the bad news?
I’m going to take a blogging break this week.
Just this week?
Well, until I get some new To-Do items off my list. I need to get an academic advisor and discuss possibilities of an assistanceship. Unless you want to fund my graduate school…
Um, I’ll get back to you on that.

The break shouldn’t be too long. I'll miss you guys...I’ll be back soon!

Friday, March 28, 2008

Read Between the Lines

I haven't mentioned any books I'm reading on this blog. This is not because I don't read but more so because I only read when I have a spare moment. This doesn't happen frequently so the books I was reading last December are the books I'm still currently reading.

This week I received an email forward from a former roommate. It was the Get-To-Know-You type. The forward contained approximately 20 questions that had been answered by the sender. I was to replace her answers with mine, send it back, and continue the forward. The end result is learning interesting facts about each other.

I started my answers. Nearing the end, I came to this question: "What book are you currently reading?" I quickly thought of the 2 on my nightstand. One is a relationship guide and the other - written specifically for women - focuses on understanding and expanding one's personal finances.

The titles?

First Comes Love and Prince Charming isn't Coming

I don't think I could have been more ironic if I'd tried.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Waste Not, Want Not

What the... is that a bus coming towards me?

No. It's actually three buses cut and welded together to form a bus stop.

I don't know who decided to turn the bus stops into works of recycled trash but that's the trend here in Athens, Georgia.

This one, I'm sure, made the local skateboarders upset. Look at all this perfect rail ~ practically screaming to be used except that only a few inches exists between each piece.

I can't figure out if this is an old Tetris game or the TV set from Barney.

Just be careful what you throw away. Who knows ~ one day our stop signs might be old, unfinished ring pops!

Monday, March 24, 2008

Scrambled Eggs Super

Mama Mia has an Easter tradition that involves a regular egg carton filled with 12 plastic eggs. Each egg contains an item that helps explain the Easter holiday to a young child. (See post below if you are interested in the egg carton contents). This year, Mama Mia told a few people about the tradition who really liked the concept.

Have I ever mentioned that Mama Mia is one of the sweetest people I know? She gathered all the supplies for those interested and made them their own Easter kit.

Including the egg cartons.

Guess what I'll be eating for awhile.

Easter Egg Lesson

1. And he went a little further and fell on his face and prayer, saying, O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt. Matthew 26:39 (sacrament cup)

2. Then one of the twelve, called Judas Iscariot, went unto the chief priests, and said unto them, What will ye give me, and I will deliver him unto you? And they covenanted with him for thirty pieces of silver. Matthew 26:14-15. This fulfilled the prophecy in Zachariah 11:12 – 14 that Jesus would be sold for 30 pieces of silver. (3 dimes)

3. When the morning was come, all the chief priests and elders of the people took counsel against Jesus to put him to death: And when they had bound him, they led him away, and delivered him to Pontius Pilate the governor. Matthew 27:1-2 (knotted twine)

4. When Pilate saw that he could prevail northing, but that rather a tumult was made, he took water, and washed his hands before the multitude, saying, I am innocent of the blood of this just person; see ye to it. Then answered all the people, and said, His blood be on us, and on our children. Then released he Barabbas unto them: and when he had scourged Jesus, he delivered him to be crucified. Matthew 27:24-26 Do we also wash our hands? (Chunk of hand soap)

5. And they stripped him, and put on him a scarlet robe. And when they had platted a crown of thorns, they put it upon his head, and a reed in his right hand; and they bowed the knee before him, and mocked him saying, Hail, King of Jews! And they spit upon him, and took the reed, and smote him on the head. Matthew 27:28-30 (square of red velvet)

6. And after that they had mocked him, they took the robe off from him, and put his own raiment on him, and led him away to crucify him. And as they came out, they found a man of Cyrene, Simon by name: him they compelled to bear his cross. Matthew 2:31-32. And He was crucified… nailed to the cross. Press this nail into your hand… feel how it must have hurt. (toothpick cross, tiny nail)

7. And they crucified him, and parted his garments, casting lots: that it might be fulfilled which was spoken by the prophet… And sitting down they watched him there. Matthew 27:35-36 (small pair of dice)

8. Jesus, when he had cried again with a loud voice, yielded up the ghost. And, behold, the veil of the temple was rent in twain from the top to the bottom; and the earth did quake, and the rocks rent: Now when the centurion, and they that were with him, watching Jesus, saw the earthquake, and those things that were done, they feared greatly, saying, Truly this was the Son of God Matthew 27:50, 54 (tiny bag of crushed rock or potting soil)

9. (Then Joseph, a rich man) went to Pilate, and begged the body of Jesus. Then Pilate commanded the body to be delivered. And when Joseph had taken the body he wrapped it in a clean linen cloth, and laid it in his own new tomb, which he had hewn out in the rock. Matthew 27:58 – 60 (strip of white cloth)

10. And he rolled a great stone to the door of the sepulcher, and departed. Pilate said unto them (the chief priests and Pharisees), Ye have a watch: go your way; make it as sure as ye can. So they went, and made the sepulcher sure, sealing the stone, and setting a watch. Matthew 27:60, 65-66 (a stone)

11. And when the Sabbath was past, Mary Magdalene, and Mary, the mother of James, and Salome, had bought sweet spices, that they might come and anoint him. And, behold, there was a great earthquake: for the angel of the Lord descended from heaven, and came and rolled back the stone from the door, and sat upon it. And the angel… said unto the women, Fear not ye: for I know that ye seek Jesus, which was crucified. (mark 16:1, Matthew 28:2, 5 (Bay leaf or other herb)

12. He is not here: for He is risen, as He said. Matthew 28:6 (egg is empty)

Friday, March 21, 2008

I've been Googled

"Mammogrammed Jewelry"

Someone typed that phrase into a search engine and wound up on my blog. Mammogrammed Jewelry, huh. As in bracelets? How does the sizing work? Hypothetically speaking, say I have petite wrists. ...just pretend okay. So, should I order the "Almost A" or "Barely B"? What about guys? Is this jewelry only for women? Will $1 of all bracelet proceeds go to support Breast Cancer Research? And where does one buy this jewelry? Sooo many questions.

Goodness, a post about bras and now mammogrammed jewelry. I'd say this blog just hit a new low.

...and no, mammogrammed is not a word. I'm just reported the word as it came to me.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Reality Bites

I went to the gym yesterday for the first time since January. I was quite excited since I’ve had two major interruptions to my workout routine. There was my Anatomy class, which took more of my social life than I anticipated, followed by a brief encounter with a stress fracture. I waited until the doctor said I could run again but realized since my final was approaching with little less than three weeks to prepare, I should wait a little longer to test the healed foot.

The final was yesterday therefore last night was my anticipated gym night. I’m sure normal people would celebrate by going to dinner, or a movie, or not going out but I’m different. I wanted to go running.

My gym has 10 - 12 TVs mounted to the wall so runners, stair steppers, or cyclists can watch programs while they exercise. Last night, it seemed that each TV was tuned to a different reality show. I thought the networks would run out of ideas years ago. Survivor, Big Brother, Real World, and the Bachelor grabbed the media’s attention. Oh, it's just a fad. But years later we’ve gone through Newly Weds, Till Death Do Us Part, The Osmonds, Iron Chef, Wife Swap, Dancing with the Stars, and countless others. I’m not good at predicting fads apparently. And I thought…

What if I had a reality TV show? I ruled out the relationship theme. Bachelor, Bachelorette, Average Joe, and A Shot at Love have covered every angle. I also don’t want to drink pureed pig feet, lie in a vat of mice, or eat a live spider so Survivor won’t, shall we say, survive. And my last name isn’t Simpson so I’m not forcing anyone to watch my family assist my band career or my first attempt at marriage.

The reality is that I go to work Monday through Friday. I’m a secretary for a construction agency and I’m bored at work. I check facebook. I blog. I balance my checkbook. I email.

So here’s my idea for the show: I take 5 contestants. They each get one day of the week. Whoever can make it through the day without dying of boredom wins. The catch, of course, is that they will not have access to the internet. The computer will only have three screens to switch between: Word, Excel, and the Standard or Scientific Calculator.

The winner gets my job. How's that for reality.

Monday, March 17, 2008

Stop, Look, & Listen

Today you are treated to more of my grade school art. These papers were stapled together thus making the weight too heavy to hang on the fridge. My art is just that good. No fridge. Just memory books. Stuffed in a box. Shoved in the basement.

Anyway, the lesson must have been on safety since I'd glued red, yellow, and green dots to a stoplight on the first page. The next three drawings, as you will see, indicate the safe way to cross a street.

I Stop: If I had to choose which limbs to go without, the picture indicates I'd keep my legs. This means I'd have to learn to type with my toes but that's an entirely different post.

I Look: A rare self drawing done during my jack-o-lantern days. Oh, and I like to think outside the line.

I Listen: Whew, good thing I grew into those ears. Good thing I gave up wearing bandanas. And good thing I'm no longer bald.

Next lesson: asking friends to jump out at red lights and hit the pedestrian crossing button so the light will turn green.

Friday, March 14, 2008

The Bro

Today is my last official day of class (yippee) for the quarter. Although I don't have much to type before I leave for lab, I did want to share a photo from an email I received yesterday. Now, I realize I live in the South and therefore breathe redneck but really, must you send me this picture?

And pray tell, just who is going to alert this individual that while Hanes does have an array of colors, Fruit of the Loom chafes less.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008


Mama Mia found a box of old papers she'd saved from my elementary school days. I sifted through some old report cards, language assignments, and art projects. One was a construction paper cutout of my side silhouette.

Goodness I had long bangs. Goodness I actually had bangs!

Posing for the picture felt more like a mug shot. (or what I imagine a mug shot would be like) ...and I got an idea.
One would think I don't have a final next Tuesday to study for.

Monday, March 10, 2008

Ticket? Check

It was bound to happen.

I'm actually surprised it took this long.

Saturday evening I was driving home from Atlanta. I was enjoying a new cd - lost in a drum beat and guitar trance. The traffic was light and I casually passed cars driving slowly.

I passed a dark area of road and saw head lights flicker in my rear view mirror. Head lights not previously seen.

Then the red and blue lights joined.

I knew the second I passed the dark area that I'd just helped some cop meet his quota.

"Ma'am, I clocked you going 77 in a 55. That's why I pulled you over."
"Yes sir, I was speeding."
"Well, I hate to write this ticket. I'll see if I can knock your speed down to just 14 over."
"I'd appreciate that."

The ticket clocks me at 69. I'm sure 77 was even a little low. So, I checked some "FIRSTS" off my list. First time getting pulled over. First time getting a ticket.

Coming soon: First time going to traffic court...

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

The 9th Life

Disclaimer: Sometimes bad things happen to good people, or in this instance, bad things happen to good animals. I realize this post contains sensitive information to animal lovers and I don’t mean to downplay any of the events. I’m just reporting the facts.

It’s a rare occasion to have anyone in my car, let alone 3 family members. This Sunday, I was driving Mama Mia, Johnny Cherie, and Little Boy Blue home from a church dinner. It was after 7, the sun was setting, and my light was green. As I passed through to the other side of the intersection, a dark cat jetted from the left before I had time to respond.

Enter slow motion

I could brake but the car behind me was too close. On the left was oncoming traffic; the right had several parallel parked vehicles. My only option was to continue driving.

The unexpected speed bump smacked me back into real time.

I gasped and clutched my gaping mouth. I was horrified and stunned. I felt a lump form in my stomach. The seconds seemed, once again, to tick backwards.

I was glad to have Mama Mia with me. There are times when only a mother’s voice can comfort. She calmly assured me that everything would be okay and after a few deep breaths, I began to feel better.

Then Johnny-Cherie chirped from the back. “Hey Charlotte, why did the cat cross the road?”
“I don’t know. Why?”
“It didn’t.”

Her comment didn’t help quite like Mama Mia’s.

I'm sorry cat...

Monday, March 3, 2008

3rd Time's the Charm

I love pickup lines. I'm not sure when, where, or how I developed this bond with cheesy sayings but I enjoy any chance to learn or use these silly lines. Johnny-Cherie came home the other night and shared a new pick up line with me. I laughed and decided to try the saying on some friends.

The next day I was online chatting and, although pickup lines don't even work in person, I decided to try some virtual flirting with Scottie-the-Hottie.

Me: Scott, do you have a raisin?
STH: Yes
Me: ...wrong answer.
STH: I don't like raisins...?
Me: Do you actually have raisins with you at this exact moment?
STH: As part of a larger food product, yes.
Me: You have grapes?
STH: No, I have a granola bar with raisins. This is a really long pick up line sequence.
Me: Never mind.

Later, I tried the same line on another friend and got similar results.

Me: Friend, do you have a raisin?
Friend yet to receive a blog nickname: Yes I do.
Me: hmm...that's the wrong answer.
Nameless friend: Ok. No, I don't.
Me: *sigh

I tried the line for the third time with Mr. Reynolds.

Me: Mr. Reynolds, do you have a raisin?
Tinfoil Guy: Not anywhere near me.
Me: Oh about a date?

I learned a valuable lesson with pickup lines: They don't work via online chat. Pickup lines don't work in person...but we already knew that.