Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Hindsight is $20 $20

I wanted glasses when I was younger. So badly, in fact, that I popped out the tinted lenses from a pair of sunglasses and wore just the frames.

Everywhere. To school, to the grocery store, around the house, while playing outside...

I remember riding my bicycle in the street one day while wearing my glasses. The neighbors were remodeling their home and a construction crew was busy at work. I rode up then down the street; up and back again. I'm not sure if I hit a small rock or shifted my balance but one moment I was riding high and the next found me on the asphalt next to my fallen bike. I laid there for what seemed like only a second before a construction member rushed to my side to help me. He picked up my bike and I dusted my knees. He then retrieved my blue frames and handed them to me.

I was humiliated.

He knew! He knew my adorable, cute frames were fake! Never mind that I'd just crashed my bike in front of him, he knew my glasses were plastic, empty frames.

I went in the house and waited until they left before I rode my bike again.

Little did I know that I would actually need glasses in 8th grade.

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I wanted braces when I was younger. So badly, in fact, that I carefully unbent a paper clip until it resembled my top row of teeth. I crumbled small bits of aluminum foil around the paper clip to form makeshift brackets. I connected the paperclip and brackets to my teeth with a rubber band. It was a nuisance to keep in my mouth (I laugh now at how dedicated I was to this endeavor) but I would put it in my mouth each afternoon as soon as I got home from school.
Little did I know that I would actually need braces during high school.
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I wish I'd recognized the trend when I was little.
* Wear fake glasses, get real glasses
* Wear fake braces, get real braces
I sure wish I'd carried around a pocketful of Monopoly money.

Monday, July 20, 2009

My Bl*nk*ng Car

My car is a keeper. I bought her after I graduated from college in 2002 and she's been my trusty sidekick since. She and I have been to various states, run over a few nails, blown a tire on the interstate, and been pulled over for going a little too fast.

As cool cars go, I think mine's the coolest. I mean, she blinks.

BLINKS, I tell ya!

I bet your car doesn't blink.

Please ignore the check engine light. I ran out of electrical tape. Oh, and ignore the fact that every time I shift, the car clunks like a cheap casino machine. Most car owners can only wish to be that cool.

Friday, July 10, 2009

I Tri-ed

A few months ago, a friend mentioned she was training for a triathlon. Being the great friend that I am, I decided to invite myself. We trained on our own and shared a few concerns / tips / achievements when we saw each other. Then the week of the event came.
I couldn't sleep.
Every night was a dream about the event. I dreamt I forgot my socks. My shoes. My hat. One night I actually dreamt that someone stole the front tire from my bike. It was a long week.
And then Saturday came.
Four of us traveled to Hilton Head, SC the day before. We ate dinner, went for a leisurely swim at the hotel, and packed the car for the next day. 5:15 on a Saturday comes quickly!
We left the hotel and got to the beach at 6:15. This is my 'remind me why I'm here so early and why are you taking pictures of me' face. Cute. I know.

We registered. Got our race numbers. They put your registration number on your arm and your age on your leg. I'm telling you...there's nothing like nearly running out of energy during the running portion - you want to quit - and then you see some lady pass you and she has a '59' written on her calf to get you moving again!

It was my second sprint triathlon. I'm not brave enough to try longer distances yet.

And ladies, um, ladies...let me give you six reasons why you should compete in a triathlon.

Did you find all six abs? Um, hello!

Oh, hi mom. ahem.
As I was saying... what was I saying?!

Oh, right, 6 reasons why you should compete in a triathlon.
1. It's fun.
2. You get to swim in the ocean.
3. You get a tan.
4. You get a t-shirt.
5. You are done by 10 in the morning and can spend the rest of the day on the beach.
6. You can blog about it.

Try it!