Candy Land

I used to work for a company that held seminars for people interested in Real Estate. I was on the phone with a customer one day and they asked, "Do you realize the knowledge you have at your fingertips?!" I awkwardly admitted I had never attended a seminar or looked through any material. The customer, completely amazed at my lack of interest, refrained from scolding me and I mentally committed to learn the tricks of the trade. The knowledge I left with wouldn't qualify me as an instructor but it is enough to appreciate these fine works of gingerbread houses - well, graham cracker anyway.

FOR SALE: 1 bedroom; 1 bath; snow capped roof; mint brick; licorice door frame; nerd paneling; gumdrop bushes. Complimentary roof opening for summer breeze. Total Fat: 9G Calories: 360 Market Price: $2.61 Nice Neighborhood. Call Muffin Man (on Drury Lane) for more details.

FOR SALE: Modified Double-wide; 2 bedroom; 1.5 bath; gummi bear insulated roof; licorice piping door, window, and walkway; cookie/snow capped side decal; minty walls; m&m garden. Total Fat: 11G Calories: 398 Market Price: $4.23 Able to deliver. Call Little Debbie for details.

FOR SALE: Abandoned cookie house in woods. Great fixer-upper project for ambitious owner. 1 bedroom; 1 bath; gumdrop grass; gummi bear adorned lawn (mass graveyard?); licorice trunk in roof for potential fire escape or tree swing; house entirely filled with skittles, gummi bears, and m&ms for midnight snacks; child delight. Total Fat: 21G Calories: 618 Market Price: $6.29 Call former occupants - Hansel & Gretel for details. They prefer phone interviews - something about breadcrumbs and witches.