Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Golf = ROFL

I am going back to school with the intent of becoming a P.E./Health teacher. Since I'll evenutally be responsible for teaching different sports, part of my education is learning these sports. This semester I'm in a class that focuses on golf for the first several weeks then switches to handball for the last half.

Friday was the first day our class went to the driving range. Now, I have been to a driving range before but I'm not very good. Period. I couldn't even remember which club to use. In fact, until Friday, I defined golf very differently.

Golf according to Charlottalove:

Club: Where a UGA student goes to par-tay.
Ball: A traditional dance requiring dresses or tuxes.
Mulligan: Gilligan's cousin. I picture him with a mullet.
Course: A class offered by UGA.
18 holes: What an 18-wheeler will get if it drives over a pile of nails.
Iron: Element on the periodic table represented by the letters Fe.
Wedge: A style of shoe.
Putter: A vehicle with starting difficulties.
Tiger Woods: Sequel to Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
Birdie: Lunch for a cat.
Greens: Vegetables at dinner time.
Stroke: A swimming maneuver.
Driving Range: Area a teenager is allowed to take the car without consequences.
Slice: An order of pizza.
Swing: Type of equipment at the park.

As you can see, I have lots to learn. It should be fun though. Part of my grade requires me to play a round of 9 holes. Wish me luck ~ I'm off to the driving ran...

oops...sorry about that.
You have probably noticed but I thought I but I thought I should explain. Due to my new schedule, my blog posts and comments to your blogs have been and will be a bit erratic. This graduate school idea was a bit harder than I anticipated.


Beth said...

Well done! You've got a great mind and a delightful sense of humour.
And don't worry about a lack of skill in certain sports. Rarely did I ever have a P.E. teacher who could actually play a sport - they just had loud voices to tell us what we were doing wrong.

Craze said...

LOL! Love the humor! You'll learn tons I'm sure, good luck at the course!

Bone said...

I love golf, but most of the time I hate it.

I think I might try some of your definitions though. Everytime I hit a bad slice, I'll try thinking of pizza.

Coordination Queen said...

YAY for PE teachers! Kylie really likes hers, it is a lady in our ward. And all they've done this year is run around and play games.

Shankar said...

I tried to use a golf term to explain to someone how to pronounce my name correctly, as the two of them rhyme.

"What do you call those large sandy pits on a golf course?", I asked, expecting the other person to say it was a bunker.

"A sandtrap" was his answer.

Above Average Joe said...

I think Mark Twain called golf a good walk wasted.

Shankar said...

Follow-up to my earlier comment:

"A sandtrap", was her answer as well.

Charlotte was another one who fell into that, um, trap. She just wasn't the first to do so.

Melissa said...

Girl you are too funny! How are you so witty all of the time?

Amber said...

You'll be the funniest PE teacher ever! Better than any of elementary PE teacher wore a Speedo during swimming lessons (yes, we had a pool in elementary school) was weird then, and even weirder to think about now.

Oh, and Kroger will automatically double your coupons so you don't have to ask them....which is nice because I hate to actually ask for discounts!

Mik"e" said...

Although the posts will be spread out, it is still good to see you still writing. Your random thoughts and ideas are far too funny to just quite this altogether!

Anonymous said...

I love it! Always a fun read!