A few weeks ago, I discovered my jeans had outgrown me. Usually this would be good news - not for me. This means I had to go jean shopping and I'm not fond of shopping. I am very content with my body - don't get me wrong - but according to the rest of the clothing industry, I'm odd shaped. I have a normal waist for my weight but a rather long inseam. Since I enjoy biking, my thighs are a bit thicker.
Normal waist + long legs + thick thighs = Odd size that's difficult to find.
I knew I would be in
He agreed. Poor, poor guy.
We arrived and "Mission (Impossible) Jean" began.
Store #1: "Okay, I'm wearing jeans size 10 long. Let's start with that size and try a few styles." He helped and I went to try on a few pair. I couldn't even zip them up. Confused, I went back and asked him to help me locate the 12's. That size didn't fit either. I refused to go up another size so we left.
Store #2: "Okay, help me find a 9 or an 11." "Wait...," he said, "What happened to the 10s and 12s?" "They don't use that sizing system at this store - here it is odd numbers instead of even." The 11 was tight. Humbly I tried on the 13. It fit fine. Not convinced this was the pair of pants for me, I noted the name of the store and we left to try some other stores.
Store #I'm getting hungry: "Another store and they use even numbers. Let me try a 12. " This time, the pants fit like an over sized parachute! I had to go back and get a 10 - still too large. The 8 - too snug.
Store #Let-me-just-look-real-quick: This store was having a 50% off sale which meant the jeans were now affordable. They only had regular length jeans - which looked like capris.
Store #Are-we-done-yet: "Whoa, I can buy an iPod cheaper than this pair of jeans. Never mind."
I'm not sure exactly how many stores we entered. The total was enough: enough for me to find a decent pair; enough for him to appreciate the simplicity of male standardized pant sizes.
And that is why pants that no longer stay up without a belt is bad news.