When I meet someone new, conversation frequently leads to questions regarding my occupation.
"So what type of work do you do?" Me? Oh, I work for a construction agency. "Interesting. So, are you actually building the buildings?" No, I'm the executive assistant for a small office. "Nice. That sounds fun."
Boring would be a better term. While applying to a few jobs recently, I struggle to pinpoint my exact duties. Not including time spent emailing, blogging, or answering the phone, just what do I do all day? See if you can figure it out. This is just one conversation I had lately with Jordan - the office temp/windshield.
Jordan: Charlotte, you look really nice today.
Charlotta: Aww, thanks.
J: Don't you know today is Opposite Day?
C: Did you really just say that? That's so 5th grade.
J: I know. I loved Opposite Day when I was little.
C: Speaking of 5th grade, did you ever own a hyper color t-shirt?
J: A what?
C: Hyper color. You know - those shirts that changed color with the temperature.
J: Oh yeah! I had an off brand - not hyper color. It was florescent yellow or some other bright color.
C: That's it. *sigh...I always wanted one of those shirts.
J: What about slap bracelets. Remember those?
C: Oh yeah! I had a few...one was pink with black polka dots.
J: Did you have those socks that bunched up?
C: No. I know what you are talking about but I just scrunched my socks and pretended to be cool.
J: Did you tie your shirt in a knot at the bottom corner?
C: All the time. I had a banana clip that I wore in my hair too. I hope you didn't have one of those.
J: No. I did have a college football team jacket though. We lived in Florida at the time and it never got cold enough to really need it. I would sweat every time I wore that stupid jacket.
C: I didn't care about football enough to get a jacket but I do remember those shoelaces that curled at the end no matter how much you pulled. Remember those?
J: Totally! I also had loafers and actually put pennies in them.
C: I went the Keds route.
J: Did you watch Fraggle Rock?
C: (singing) Down in Fraggle Rock! I loved that show.
J: What about "Legends of the Hidden Temple?"
C: Was that the game show on Nickelodeon where the contestants had to navigate through the temple maze for tokens but the weird temple demons jumped out of particular rooms? If you didn't have a token, you lost?
J: That was it.
C: What about Finder's Keepers?
J: I don't remember that one. Did you ever watch GUTS?
C: I. Loved. That. Show!
J: I heard this guy bought a piece of the Agro Crag on eBay.
C: You can buy the Crag?!
J: Apparently. He paid $75 for it.
C: What would you do with a piece of Crag?
J: Put it on a bookshelf? I don't know.
C: Oh, the phone is ringing. Back to work.
That, my friends, is how I spend an average of 40 hours per week.
I know you are but what am I?