I recently attended a religious forum where the speaker emphasized obedience in all aspects. I wasn’t too worried until he said this meant driving the posted Speed Limits. My friend TR² kicked me in my shin as a friendly reminder that speeding is one of my only flaws. That and humility. It is common knowledge that I tend to get places quicker than the time allotted on MapQuest. I think it must be a gene passed down through generations. If so, my dad passed one gene to me and gave my brother, The Dean Inc, a double dose.
It’s not that I’m speeding, but more so that I’m driving the speed limit that should have been posted. Really I’m doing the cops a favor. We have all seen those little black ropes they tie down on the road to measure the amount of traffic and average speed. Instead of putting those down all around town, the city could just hire me to drive different routes at a comfortable speed to see what the true speed limit should be. I could be hired for cheap since I don’t have a master’s degree in city-road-planning. Since I would be out on the roads, I could even monitor suspicious activity and communicate this back to the police. I’ll even hire out my car for advertisements as I drive around. Seriously, the benefits are endless.
Someone should nominate me for citizen of the year or something.